Husband Clothes

There is a disturbingly uncanny phenomenon that happens in our home about once every 4-6 weeks. I clean the bathroom big-time about once each month. (YES, that’s rare. SORRY. But that isn’t the disturbing part.) I’m talking about the Ajax comes out, tub gets scrubbed, floor and baseboards–it all gets a major overhaul. It takes like 4 hours. That bathroom sparkles and shines when I’m done, and it feels like spring every time I walk into that bathroom.

Here’s where things get psychic (or mean). It just so happens that my husband SHAVES about once every 4-6 weeks (hence his similarity to Grizzly Adams described here, till he shaves and is bald again.) SO, how is it that for each time he has shaved during our 9 years of marriage, he chooses the morning after my 4-hour bathroom scrub down? To be sure the psychic element is clear, I want to phrase this very precisely: When I don’t clean the bathroom, my husband doesn’t shave. When I DO clean the bathroom, my husband DOES shave the very next morning. For 9 years, he has done this like clockwork.

It may be important to mention that for the small, in between bathroom cleanings (Windex on the sink, mopping around the toilet–hi, 3 guys live here, gross), the shaving does not occur. Lazyhusby, are you out there? Please tell me why this happens. But I’m not feeling picky here–any husby (husband), just tell me why you think this takes place. Is my husband psychic? Is he just mean? Or is this some type of subconscious thing, kind of like right after you change the kitty litter, kitty immediately must let it rip…?

PS. I just realized, I may need to clarify for guy readers: The reason this is ironic is because hair on multiple surfaces is very difficult to clean up. Therefore, each time you shave, a pretty major bathroom cleaning must follow. (Yes, I know, you “clean it yourself.” But I think it’s safe to say that most ladies have to finish the job off. And by “finish off,” I mean “redo completely.”) Please note that your efforts do make the job easier and are greatly appreciated, which is probably why you don’t get griped at much for this, despite that it’s irritating. It’s just kind of an irritating fact of life that’s not your fault.

P.S.S. Every heard of “vacuum electric shavers”? Well, you need to. Here’s one below–4 stars, 190 customer reviews. Looks like a winner. I’m buying one.

This entry was posted on Thursday, April 10th, 2008 at 10:10 am and is filed under Housework, Hygeine, Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.