Hate It When Mother-In-Law Asks “How’s My Son?”

My husband NEVER emails, calls, or writes to his mother. She lives thousands of miles away. That must be hard. Had she been nice to me, I would love communicating with her. But as you can see from stories 1, 2, and 3, that wasn’t the case.

I find it very odd that she insists on emailing me to ask how her son is doing. I have told her so many times that I am not their go-between. So, when she sends me an Instant Message asking how he’s doing, I ALWAYS answer the same way, “Have you asked him? Just email him” to which she always responds, “No, I am afraid of taking his time.” (Note: She treats her son like precious gold, everyone else on earth like crap.) Oh, but of course, I guess I have PLENTY of time on my hands, despite huge writing projects with strict deadlines, two young boys, and husband’s job which has been 6 days a week from 9 am till 2 or 3 am for the past month or two. Sure.

I totally ignore the emails asking about her son. Then one day, I got this email: “Holly, you do realize, of course, that I need to have contact with my family.” Hm. So, I said something to the effect that her son is family (though I am NOT), and so she should let him know all about this. Her response: “Thank you.” He he. She thinks she pulls at the heart strings. Actually she pulls at the crack-me-up strings.

I do send her updates on the grandchildren from time to time. Occasionally she sends sends sarcastic messages to show me that my updates aren’t sufficient: “Thank you so much, Holly, for that story you told me a month ago about my grandsons. That one story was so interesting. After all, I NEED to know what’s going on in my boys’ lives.” Yeah. Keep talking.

Yesterday at 1:00 am, she writes me asking how her son’s new project is going. As usual I asked, “Did ya email him?” She said, “No. I know he’s busy. I’m so afraid to take his time.” Mhm. I answered that I think he’s fine but I haven’t seen him for about a months as he has been working from about 9am till 2am, so she might get more info if she contacts him. You know what she answered? “You’re kind.” Hm.

No, she’s kind. Don’t you think? Well, that’s all fine because she makes me feel lucky. I am SO lucky that this lady lives thousands of miles from here. I’m also lucky that my husband is working his heart out at work because he’s nervous that people have been let go. He takes such good care of us. Also his outfit matched today and he looked REALLY handsome. See, when it’s 2:30 am, I start getting a little lovey dovey and really thankful for stuff. Also, my boys are the most irresistable kids ever. Why did I get all this good stuff? Have I begun to ramble?

Uh, it’s 2:30 am. I was supposed to be in bed by 11 pm. Why no self-discipline???? Good night.

3 Responses to “Hate It When Mother-In-Law Asks “How’s My Son?””

  1. A Week In The Life of A Redhead Says:

    A lot of red wine might help with her…

    A LOT.

    Catherine, the redheaded blogger

  2. Holly Kay Says:

    Oh, yes, good idea. I’ll try to get her drunk when she’s around.

    OH, you meant ME. hehehehhahahhaha. Funny, funny me.

    YES, thank you Catherine–you redheads know what you’re talking about. Thanks for this excellent advice! I think lots of red wine would go a long way in my efforts to be amused by, rather than offended by, her!

    –Holly Kay

  3. Deb (Missives From Suburbia) Says:

    This is why I hope my son turns out to be gay. I won’t have to suffer a daughter-in-law (although I’m sure you’re a wonderful one I would be thrilled to have), so I won’t have to turn into a hag of a mother-in-law.

    Hilarious stuff so far (saw your ad on Dooce). I have to catch up on your archives, but I love blogging about my husband, because he’s such an easy target. Clearly, we have a lot in common.

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