STOP! Shower Time.
There are two important morning routines in our home: 1) My husband NEVER wakes up earlier than 8:00 am, though he needs to wake up by 7:30 am. 2) If I wake up early to take a shower, so as to free the bathroom up early, my husband miraculously WAKES up, DARTS out of bed, and NEEDS to get in the shower IMMEDIATELY. 3) In either and all other scenarios, my husband is going to be late to work, and this is “my fault.” This infuriates me and causes HUGE arguments in a usually peaceful home.
This morning, I got in the shower at 7:15 am–there’s NO WAY my husband’s getting up at that time. He sets the alarm at 7:30 am, and sleeps WAY beyond that.
But no matter to me. I’m up early, in the shower, today my son’s getting to school on TIME, baby! Yeah. 7:30 am. I’m enjoying my freshly cleaned, flower-scented hair, taking my time in my relaxing, warm shower….then suddenly BOOM BOOM BOOM.
Hu? Someone’s up? But that can’t be. It’s only 7:30 am. No one else in the house will be up until at least 8:30 am, maybe 8:00 am, but definitely not NOW!
I open the door, and my husband’s looking at me AALLLLLLL irritated. He says, “I need to take a SHOWER. I have to be at work at 9:00 am. Now I’m going to be LATE.”
My response in a very unkind voice: “DEAR, it’s 7:30 am. You haven’t been up this early in SEVERAL YEARS. Yet suddenly you’re going to be LATE because I’m in the SHOWER? DOESN’T MAKE SENSE.”
See, if he HAD a morning schedule, we, as in the other THREE people in this house, would be happy to accomodate him. After all, his getting to work by a reasonable time does allow us many fun and necessary things in life–we recognize that (but then so does MY money). The problem is, there is no morning schedule. It’s what he wants to do whenever he’s finally able to get his behind out of bed. And if it happens to be early for the first time in years, oh my, well I guess we ALL needed to work harder to ANTICIPATE THAT.
While I usually get over my husband’s lapses in judgement pretty quickly, I’m still highly annoyed at him for his buggy eyes blaming me for his tardiness this morning. I have my own tardiness to worry about. I’m tardy to take my son to school at least once a week. Do I look buggy eyed at my husband and ask him why he’s in the shower? NO, I don’t think I do. I think it’s time he cut out the morning blame routine and planning his morning schedule like an adult.
June 4th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
My suggestion? When his alarm goes off, turn the shower on and go get the kids ready for school. He’ll think you’re in there and get his own self out of bed. Problem solved!
June 4th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Bianka,
You are one smart cookie.
Yes, this pretty much solves everything. I am laughing so hard, my irritation has *almost* dissipated.
Thank you so much;)
Holly
June 5th, 2008 at 11:48 am
Shucks, Bianka stole my idea.
I call it the “Uh oh-wife-doing-something-for-herself-reflex”. Mind you a shower is more of a necessity than a luxury but it’s still classified as alone time so Husband has to interrupt.
June 5th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
Mickie,
YES, you are so right! There absolutely is a reflex of “stop-wife-from-doing-sth-for-herself” involved here. Thank heaven, it doesn’t happen often, but in this situation, it’s crystal clear.
You have such a great way of putting things.
June 5th, 2008 at 2:37 pm
Dang it, that was MY idea to. That or make a big deal about how you need to take a shower. That will make him NEED TO TAKE his RIGHT NOW. Because that is what husbands do. Inconvience their wives. I think it’s a secret sport…
“Oh yeah? Well I got MY wife to drive 50 miles to bring me a hamburger so that I did have to drive two blocks to get it myself!”
“That’s NOTHING. I got MY wife to schedule her c-section so that it didn’t interfere with football season! She was pregnant for 15 months!”
June 5th, 2008 at 6:42 pm
The title of this entry makes me think “Stop. Hammer Time.” Was that intentional?
June 5th, 2008 at 7:59 pm
Oh yes, that was very intentional. I made this post several weeks ago about my husband’s yellow pants. As a joke I put a link to MC Hammer’s “Can’t Touch This” video on YouTube. EVERYONE clicked on it.
Since then, I can’t get the song out of my head. Yet I also don’t know the words. So, that’s fun.