My Kitchen is a Freak Show
Hi. My husband has turned our kitchen into a total FREAK SHOW. It’s getting worse each day. I can no longer really even address it, because I’m trying to pretend it isn’t there. It’s too stressful to handle. The only thing that makes me feel calmer is to just stay the h*@# out of that kitchen.
This all started because my husband recently took up barbecuing, which results in SUCH GOOD FOOD. However, it results in my husband spending a LOT of time in the kitchen. It’s also causing him to venture into places he’s never gone before (such as the kitchen cupboard). I guess this is exciting him and giving him some kind of big zest for life because he’s doing ALL KINDS of crazy stuff.
Prime example: He took something as simple as a pair of transparent salt and pepper shakers, and he managed to make a horrendously embarrassing display of them. They are pictured above. This is not a fake photograph–I just got them in the state they were in and photographed them. This is not a case of one shaker was visible, and the other was tucked away, therefore someone accidentally filled them both with salt. Oh no, not in my freak show home.
Last night when I noticed that both the salt AND pepper shakers are full of salt, I naturally got extremely irritated and asked, “Honey, why isn’t there pepper in one of these?”
He looked up (as he marinaded tonight’s food), and said, “We don’t need pepper. I don’t even use it on my food.”
Don’t you enjoy that response? Doesn’t it say so much about my husband’s perspective on life and partnerships? Also, don’t you feel that having two shakers full of salt makes my family look classy, intelligent, and just generally sound of mind? THANKS. So do I.
September 23rd, 2008 at 10:21 pm
Think of it this way, Holly - at least the husband is making an effort in the kitchen!
September 23rd, 2008 at 10:54 pm
Noemi, you are right. I will take barbecue with 2 salt shakers anytime (versus no barbecue and “normal” shakers).
He’s also being really cute and flirty! I like that too:)
September 24th, 2008 at 9:59 am
You don’t need a pepper shaker, you need a pepper GRINDER! Fresh-ground pepper beats the pants off that powdery crap. So maybe he’s on to something.
September 24th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
Cute and flirty, hm? He’s trying to even out the herd, isn’t he? Next thing we know, you’ll be all, “Hi, remember how I have a brand new baby? Well in about 8 months I’ll have another one! STUPID DELICIOUS BARBECUE!”
September 26th, 2008 at 3:09 pm
Hi Miss Thystle,
You have an excellent point. In fact, my husband has already hinted about the fourth child. Well, by “hinted,” I mean he keeps saying, “We should hurry up and have a fourth, that way they’ll be close in age.”
I’m like “they’ll”? Saying it that way makes it perfectly clear that he assumes the fourth is a reality. Of course he does. He’s never home, after all (except now).
September 28th, 2008 at 5:15 pm
Both of my shakers are full of salt and I’m perfectly happy with it that way. Why? Because I only grind my pepper, I NEVER shake it ;o)